Sham Romantic

by The Jilters

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04:34
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04:51
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04:12
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04:32
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04:03
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04:10
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04:06
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credits

released December 19, 2017

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The Jilters Alameda, California

The Jilters originate from a college pit band. 20 years ago, drummer, Chuck Kapelke, and pianist, Chris Dubois, played for a Harvard theater company called The Hasty Pudding. Reunited years later in California, the two started developing new material in basements and spare rooms, eventually adding Travis Hanna on bass, Jeff Worrall on trumpet, Ethan Levitt on sax, and Matt McLean on guitar. ... more

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Track Name: Sunset
I think we both know,
You and I are nothing special.
You like me around,
But you don't think that I've got potential.

And I think you are fine,
But I don't find that we're connecting.
We're each a memory,
The other of us is out collecting.

Come with me,
On a trip,
And we'll pretend to be,
Deep in love,
As we sip,
One rum drink after another.

Watching the sun slip,
Into the Caribbean Sea,
And acting as if neither is aware,
That neither of us actually cares,
For the other.

Let’s delay the end,
Continue this aimless diversion.
A long weekend of pretend,
A sham romantic beach excursion.

Come with me,
On a trip,
And we'll pretend to be,
Deep in love,
As we sip,
One rum drink after another.

Watching the sun slip,
Into the Caribbean Sea,
And acting as if neither is aware,
That neither of us actually cares,
For the other.

Clear blue waters, palm trees and white sands
We'll sail among the islands with no plans
Small umbrellas lodged in exotic fruit
High-end dining in our bathing suits

All while we try to be unaware,
That you and I, we aren't going anywhere.

Come with me,
On a trip,
And we'll pretend to be,
Deep in love,
As we sip,
One rum drink after another.

Watching the sun slip,
Into the Caribbean Sea,
And acting as if neither is aware,
That neither of us actually cares,
For the other.
Track Name: Go Home Joe
Well it was Monday night,
And I was getting my drink on,
Tossing back some Bourbon,
Told the man to keep them coming.

Pretty soon,
Everything was golden,
A fifth in my belly,
Plus the one that I was holding,

I was just warming up,
Thought I’d barely started,
'Till I stood up and saw the world spinning.

There were fine looking ladies at the end of the bar,
In the state I was in, they seemed so far.
I stumbled on over thinking I was all fly.
Next thing I know, I’ve got mace in my eyes.

I wasn’t hurt, I could feel no pain.
All that cheap booze had shut down my brain
But in the background, cutting through the haze,
The bartender’s voice was calling out my name.

Chorus
He said “Go home Joe. I can’t serve you no more.”
“Pick yourself up off the floor”
He said “I’m begging you please.”
“Don’t want to call the police.”
“But pretty soon I won’t have a choice”

He said “Go home Joe. I can’t serve you no more.”
“I’m showing your ass to the door.”
He said “My heart’s really bleeding”
“But it’s no use pleading.”
“One more and you might not be breathing.”

Well it was Tuesday morning,
And I was feeling rough.
I should have got the license plate off that Mac truck.

Not a problem, a little “hair of the dog”,
I pull on my hat and hit the local pub.
It was half past 10, and I was pitchers to the wind,
Starting my day all over again.

I wasn’t looking for trouble but I found myself a fight.
The dude was 6’ 4” I thought 4’ 5”.
I rolled up my sleeves and punched him in the eye
Several seconds later, I’m staring at tile.

I wasn’t hurt, I could feel no pain.
All that cheap booze had shut down my brain
But in the background, cutting through the haze,
The bartender’s voice was calling out my name.

[Chorus]

Well I’ve been thinking
If I keep drinking
I guess I’m ‘bout to lose my mind.
Track Name: Either Way
Could it be this is the end now
Could it be
Suddenly I don’t know what to say
But maybe if I’m honest I’d admit that I don’t want this
Or that I’ll be just fine either way

I don’t know what to do now
I don’t know
Where to go, it’s so hard to say
My thoughts all seem so scattered
When it really doesn’t matter
I think I’ll be just fine either way

Don’t know how I’ll feel if it’s really behind
But there’s a certain appeal to having made up my mind
And I know that either way I could later say that I made a mistake today
But probably either way is just fine

Is it right that I’m not worried
Is it right
There’s no fight it seems in me today
I’m not feeling any sorrow
Maybe that’ll come tomorrow
Or maybe I’ll be just fine either way

Don’t know how I’ll feel if it’s really behind
But there’s a certain appeal to having made up my mind
And I know that either way I could later say that I made a mistake today
But probably either way is just fine
Track Name: At All
What did you just say
I don’t believe it
Is there any other way
That you could mean it

No, you don’t seem to mind
What you just said implied

I don’t think that I’m the type
To overreact
To an inconsequential snipe
But I (have to) see that
You don’t seem to mind
What you just said implied

You know it makes me feel particularly small
And I wonder if you care at all
You seem (to be) happier after I fall
And I wonder if you care at all
I wonder if you care at all [drop vocal]

It was clearly you intent
As you were shouting
To be spiteful, not just to vent
Seems there’s no doubting
You had it in mind
To convey what you implied

I struggle as I seek
Another meaning as you speak
With allusions so obscene
But you’ve left me little room
For anything but to assume
I understand what you mean

I heard what you said
You can’t defend it
You’re not at all upset
So don’t pretend it
Wasn’t on your mind
You meant what you implied
Track Name: Sorry Anyway
Well it happens now and then;
I guess it's time for it again.
How could I forget?

She wants to air out her frustrations
And tell me expectations
Haven't been met.

So I’ve got to form a plan
To show her I'm the man
She needs me to be.
So I'll tell her that she’s wrong
And convince her she belongs
Here with me.

I'm gonna show her how
She's failed to think things through.
And then I'll forgive her and
We'll start out like new.
I'll tell her it's not too late;
I still think she should stay.
(And if that doesn't work)
I'll tell her it's not my fault
but I'm sorry anyway.

Before she spends another night,
I need to face another fight
That I need to win.
So I've got to anticipate
All the arguments that she'll make
Before they begin.

Once she hears my stance
I'm certain there's no chance
That she won't relent.
I'll tell her that I love her,
Make sure every angle's covered,
She'll be content.

I'm gonna point out all the good things that I do.
And then I'll make her realize her claims just aren't true.
I'll tell her it's not too late; I still think she should stay.
(And if that doesn't work)
I'll tell her it's not my fault, but I'm sorry anyway.

She says this isn't like the other times;
She’s not listening to my excuses or lies.
But I know it’s just like before;
I'll persuade her, I am sure.
And if that doesn’t work, I'll apologize.

So I think it's going well;
She has fallen for my spell;
I'm in control.
I don't think that I have heard
Her say a single angry word;
I'm on a roll.

Where she's going?
What did I just do?
Didn't she hear me tell her I love you?
Didn’t she hear me explain everything away?
(Well I guess that didn’t work)
She can't hear it now,
But I'm sorry anyway.
Track Name: Stranded
Everyone watches my grim situation
I’m gawked at with pity and fascination
And I understand the motivation
Assess the damage caused
Assist and then take pause
To be happy they’re not lost, like me

Everyone acts like it’s a disaster
I’m helpless because I can’t get past her
I just wish they’d move along faster
Instead of saying they understand
Offering to lend a hand
While they thank god they’re not stranded, like me

[Chorus]
I hate to throw a wrench into good intentions
But please don’t interfere
All the sympathy
Does not help me
No matter how sincere
Please stop your stares
Keep moving [cause] there’s
Nothing to see here

Everyone wants to help me through with what I am dealing
Help me to stand up as I am reeling
But I know there’s something else they are feeling
I’m sure that it makes them feel good,
Because it’s understood,
It could be worse, they could, be like me

[Chorus]

It’s not that I'm not grateful
For all the attempts to be
Helpful and empathetic
But why can't you all see
I just want to be alone
With my misery

[Chorus]
Track Name: Smirk Or Smile
I see her there, sitting way across the room
Guess I'll try a casual glance or maybe two
She catches me, but I smoothly look around
Like she was just in my general view

Pretending I am reading my book
I wait it out for a little while
Then I peek and see her look, at me, then away
Could that have been a smirk or a smile

I replay that scene in my mind
Until the point of aggravation
Did she seem to be inclined
Toward repulsion or flirtation

It's time [I’m starting] to over-analyze
As I grow more impatient
What was that I saw her in her eyes
Repulsion or flirtation

One more time, I'll sneak another look at her
But if she notices again, I think she'll know
Scan to her left, and from the corner of my eye
I see her head is tilted down, I'm good to go

I gaze straight ahead at her face and then
I linger as I think for a while
Suddenly she looks up at me again
Did she give me a smirk or a smile?

[Chorus]

There she goes, she gets up and walks away
And I'm stuck here wondering what did I see
Then she stops, just before she leaves the room
Turns her heard, just a little, toward me

I'm clearly staring at her, but I’m not moving
I’m mesmerized, by her profile
She's far away, so I can't say what she is doing
Is that face a smirk or a smile?

[Chorus]
Track Name: Better Than Perfect
He always treats you well, he’s such a nice guy
He already fell for you, you’re his life
He has got a lot of money, and a nice car
He thinks that you’re funnier than you are

Chorus
He seems to be the perfect man
You’ll stay with him while you can
But it won’t be long before you'll see
That even though it’s clearly true, he’d do anything for you
What he can’t do for you is be me

He has travelled many places and he’s well read
He has got a pretty face, just like you said
He listens well and writes love letters
But he can go to hell, you know I’m better

[Chorus]

Make a list of characteristics that you desire
And I'm sure if you keep score, he would rate higher
You can try to tell yourself that he is the right man
But you know that’s not the case, ‘cause only I am

He always treats you well, he’s such a swell guy
But we both know when you tell him you love him, you lie

[Chorus]

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